Should We Give Pills To Our Kids Or Demand Schools To Change?

school-Children

I saw the above question in the Linkedin group The ADD / ADHD Entrepreneur with the subtitle: “The following article is the proof that our educational system is failing us.” Linking to an article in the New York Times titled: Attention Disorder or Not, Pills to Help in School

First I thought that the question was ridiculous. The answer is both or neither. It depends on the school and the child. Here is my full response:

This is a complicated issue. The article and the comments reinforce my assessment that most people are uniformed or more often misinformed about ADHD, treatment, causes and learning techniques.

I think your question is wrong in that it asks an either / or question.

I say yes to everything in the appropriate situation. That of course is the hard part: figuring out what the situation is at any given point of time. Then adjusting treatment to match the situation.

The biggest unknown is the unintended consequences of whatever choices we make.

Opinions in the comments of this article were all over the place. Some praising Dr. Anderson and some excoriating him. The truth is, he is doing what he thinks is best in the situation the kids find themselves in. I as a parent may or may not agree with his position and action as is my right. But my knowledge, ideology and history can be just as wrong, carrying the same risk of unwanted consequences.

I see this all around me. I disagree with how other people do things, how Drs medicate, how schools and individual teachers teach and even and more importantly my own behavior. If I know what I’m doing is wrong but do it anyway, how can I judge what someone else does. But I do it anyway.

The fact is that we don’t know all of the details in any one situation, we do what we think is right or knowingly wrong, until we make a new choice based on new information. Unfortunately too many refuse to accept new information as counter counter intuency is just that. I find that so many issues with ADHD are counter intuitive that I am not at all surprised and the results.

How many people don’t even believe ADHD is real? I don’t have high hopes for sudden change. I do believe that articles like this and others more information will be disseminated and knowledge will get better

Please read the article here and and especially some of the comments then come back and tell me what you think.

Featured image thanks to http://kb16.tv/our-youth-deserve-education-reform/

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How schools (even great ones) fail kids with ADHD

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My friend had an interesting article published in the Washington Post. Even in one of the best school systems in the country we face plenty of aggravation taking care of our kids. There are many things that need to change institutionally to provide the best education for our children.

How schools (even great ones) fail kids with ADHD

By David Bernstein

When I was in fourth grade in the mid-1970s, my teacher pronounced that I was going to be an artist. The truth was that she didn’t think I had any academic talent to speak of. I was an “ADHD” boy who couldn’t follow directions, figure out what page we were on in the book, or turn my work in on time. With a severely limited understanding of the mind, the teacher simultaneously overestimated my artistic talent and underestimated my intellectual gifts.

School, particularly elementary school, was not for boys like me. And, 25 years later, even the very best schools have only changed slightly.
Like so many others who deviated from the norm, I learned much more from exploring my passions than I ever did from a structured school setting. With the help of numerous mentors, I taught myself how to write op-eds, lead teams, speak, and advocate. I actually cared about ideas, not primarily because of school, but despite it.  The Washington area, alive with political discourse, was the perfect place to give expression to my passions, and I moved here in my early twenties to take a job in the world of advocacy.

Now I have two boys of my own, neither of whom possesses a normative learning style. My teenage son goes to what is widely considered an excellent private school in the area with numerous wonderful, committed teachers. But like nearly every other educational institution in America, it’s built on an outmoded educational model.

Ironically, I first began to question the current model of education when the headmaster of my son’s school showed a video clip at a graduation ceremony of creativity guru Ken Robinson discussing how education kills creativity. Robinson maintains that we are using a model of education left over from the industrial revolution, where schools are organized along factory lines, complete with ringing bells and separate facilities.  “We educate kids in batches, as if the most important thing about them is their date of manufacture,” he states in another video on the topic.

Influenced by Robinson, best-selling author Seth Godin recently published a manifesto , “Stop Stealing Dreams,” on the need for radical education reform. He lays out the need for a post-industrial educational model that caters to diverse learning styles, passion for ideas and what individual students really care about. In such a school, teachers are coaches who help students in a journey of self-discovery. Students have a great deal of choice to determine what they study and how they study it, in stark contrast to the one-size-fits-all system of today.

Your child is right that he or she will never use trigonometry (unless so inclined). Exposing them to variety is one thing, but forcing the same subject for 13 years is another. In the modern marketplace, depth is just as important, if not more so, than breadth. Schools are all about breadth.

In today’s schools, the “good” students end up conforming, diminishing their own prospects for greatness, and the rest end up in an excruciating battle with themselves, their parents (trust me on this), their teachers and the endless tutors. My job as a parent, I’m reminded over and over again by the school, is to enforce the absurdity of the current system — make them turn everything in on time — which I do faithfully because there seems to be no other choice.

My youngest child, a rising second grader, rambunctious and restless as any you’ll find, has “fallen behind” in reading. He is “not sufficiently available for learning,” we are told. The teachers and guidance counselors, loving and well-meaning though they are, insist on ADHD meds so he can amp up his reading and catch up with his classmates. He’s a creative, bright, independent child, who will, there’s not a doubt in my mind, learn to read well and become highly successful. But he’s just not on their timetable for reading.

We are forced, in the words of Ken Robinson, to “anesthetize” him so he can function in today’s antiquated classroom setting. The Ritalin will do nothing to make him a more successful human being, a better thinker, or a more productive member of society. It will simply help him keep up with the masses and potentially drain him of some of his creative juices. By forcing him and so many other children like him to take these powerful drugs , schools deprive the future economy and society of precisely the creative talent they will need the most.

Greg Selkoe, the 36-year-old CEO of Karmaloop, a growing hipster media company with revenue of more than $130 Million a year, stated in a recent interview in Inc.: “I was diagnosed with ADHD in elementary school and actually got kicked out of several schools before landing in one for kids with learning issues. What made me not do well in school has actually been very beneficial in business, because I can focus on something very intensely for a short while and then move on to the next thing.”

Yet today’s schools insist that we prescribe our kids drugs to rid them of their hyper-focus.

I’ve talked with a number of educators, who see the writing on the wall for the current education system. They know that the economic reality of the day demands that schools change. But they also know that college-obsessed parents would balk at such changes, fearful that it might detract from their kids’ chances to go to the best college possible.
It will take monumental leadership to change the current educational mindset and model. In the meantime, my kids will struggle through school, battered along the way, and, like their father, be forced to discover most of their talents and passions on their own, outside of school.

See Original Article Here:

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Remember the saying, “Breakfast is the most important meal of the day?” It’s true.

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In an age when two thirds of adults are either overweight or obese and obesity rates in children continue to rise, would an intervention such as consuming breakfast daily help combat this problem? Skipping breakfast has become increasingly common in … Continue reading

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6 Lies You Should Tell Your Kids

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From the benign to the crucial — a few well-placed fibs are essential for a healthy childhood.

by Rhonda Robinson PJ Media June 4, 2012 – 7:00 am

Honesty isn’t always the best policy when it comes to reasoning with small children. Being totally honest with your children is a noble thought and in a perfect world it would certainly be considered the best practice.

However, the world isn’t, and young children are not compact adults. In fact, the world is too complex and dangerous to expect the under seven crowd to grasp the total truth on most issues. It’s hard enough trying to get them to grasp personal hygiene, let alone an ugly reality.

Young children possess limited reasoning and coping skills. Just because a child is old enough to ask if his military dad might die in Afghanistan it doesn’t mean he should carry the burden of worry every day that his father could be killed.

Lies come in all shades, sizes and colors. My rules for what constitutes a legal parental lie, have more to do with childhood fantasy, health, hygiene and safety.

If you’re not sure about what constitutes what I call a permissible lie, here is my basic rule of thumb. One day, with a little more age and maturity, he will not only realize I lied, but also understand why — all in the span of one epiphany.

Establishing truth and trust is important for a healthy, happy childhood. You tell stories to your children and keep them safe, and build trust in your relationship as they grow. Wise parents will do so without destroying their innocence.

A few well-placed lies, or crafted stories handed down from generation to generation can color a childhood with imagination, protect them from their immaturity, and shield them from the adult burden of understanding the truth of real evil.

From the most harmless fibs to verbal shields of protection, here are six lies we tell our children.

6. Of Course There’s a Tooth Fairy.

It’s not uncommon to tell kids there is a happy round guy who only brings toys to good little boys and girls. This is a generally accepted parental “white” lie. In our family, we chose to neither confirm nor deny the existence of holiday characters. We simply emphasized our faith on religious holidays.

Nevertheless, that didn’t stop us from having fun with the Tooth Fairy.

The deal is the Tooth Fairy wants good teeth. She doesn’t want dirty, unbrushed teeth. She’ll pay top dollar for a well cared-for tooth.

However, the gig is usually up at around nine or so. That’s about how old my oldest daughter was when she stuck out her hand — palm up and fingers wiggling with expectation.

“Come on mom. We both know there’s no Tooth Fairy. Why don’t you just give me the money now” she half-demanded.

“Did you hear that?” I said.

“What?”

“Listen. Can’t you hear it?”

“What is it?”

“It’s the sound of a dying Tooth Fairy. Every time a child says there’s no such thing as a Tooth Fairy, her Tooth Fairy dies.”

Her eyes narrowed, locking onto mine. She was old enough not to believe in Fairy Tales, but young enough not to be without a doubt.

Within days she lost several more teeth. She later told me she had picked the wrong week to grow up. More than a of couple decades later I received a phone call from that same daughter’s oldest son. I could hear the suspicion in his voice from the minute I answered the phone.

“Grandma?”

“Yes, hi Zach.”

“Can I ask you a question?

“Sure.”

“Are there such things as Tooth Fairies?”

I hesitated, and replied trying to sound wise, “What do you think?”

“I think mom puts the money under my pillow — I want to know what you think?”

“I think you just killed your Tooth Fairy.”

There was a brief pause of silence, “Yeah, that’s what mom said.”

The cycle of lies continues…  Continue Reading

Images: http://laurajul.dk/tag/picking-nose/ , http://theselittlewaves.com/blog/what-do-you-do-when-the-tooth-fairy-comes/

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